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11 Pieces of Relationship Advice Couples Shouldn't Ignore

Updated: Aug 28, 2023

Having an amazing relationship takes work from both people. But it's so worth it when you find the right partner! If you wanna take your relationship to the next level, there are proven things you can try. This post shares relationship advice on how to be a better partner by improving your communication, empathy, compromise, and more. Let's dive in to the 11 relationship tips couples should implement to have a better relationship!


couple happy and laughing about how they didn't ignore relationship advice

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Master the Art of Relationship Advice with Active Listening


One big relationship problem is bad communication. That's why getting better at active listening is so important and maybe the best piece of relationship advice for couples. Give your full attention when your partner talks to you. Look them in the eye, nod along, and avoid interrupting. No peeking at your phone or letting your mind wander - make your partner the focus.


Focus completely on understanding their point of view and the emotions they're trying to express. Don't just wait impatiently for your turn to talk. Really absorb what they are saying. Repeat back main points in your own words to show you comprehended what they said. Ask interested follow-up questions too, like "How did that make you feel?" or "What did you do next?". Show you care about the details.


Even if you disagree with their perspective, stay calm and don't start an argument. You can share your own viewpoint later respectfully. Practicing patient, attentive listening demonstrates to your partner that what they say matters a lot to you. It allows you to have open, empathetic communication between you.


On top of daily conversations, make time each week to check in without any technology distractions. Leave your phones in another room and give each other your full focus. Take turns sharing your feelings from that week, goals, annoyances that came up, and any relationship issues or grievances you want to discuss.


Really let your guard down and be vulnerable during these talks. Admit things that may be hard to say, like if your needs aren't getting met or if you've felt frustrated or distant from your partner lately. Listening deeply to understand each other's experiences from the week prevents little problems from building up over time into huge relationship cracks.


Having regular candid heart-to-hearts like this continues strengthening your communication and emotional connection over the long haul. You'll feel safer confiding your inner world to your partner.


Speak Your Truth with "I" Statements


When your partner does something that upsets you, it's natural to get angry and lash out. You might yell things like "You're so selfish for staying late at work again without even calling me! You're always worrying me for no reason at all!"


But talking to your partner aggressively like this makes them feel attacked and get defensive. It usually starts a big fight instead of fixing the problem.


There's a better way to express feeling angry or hurt without blaming your partner. Try using "I" statements. For example, "I feel really worried and concerned when you don't call or text me to say you'll be home late from work." This is a constructive way to communicate your feelings without attacking their character.


With "I" statements, explain how their actions made you feel personally. Don't accuse them of being selfish or careless. Taking responsibility for your own emotions helps calm things down instead of sparking a fight. Your partner will understand how they impacted you without feeling blamed.


For example, "I feel really lonely when we haven't gone out on a date night in a long time." This expresses sadness without saying it's their fault for not planning dates. Or "I feel really happy when you surprise me with flowers just because." This shares positive emotions without criticizing.


"I" statements allow you to have a calm, thoughtful talk instead of an angry blame-game. You can explain your perspective while listening to theirs. With practice, it helps solve disagreements with care before they blow up into huge fights.


Here is some relationship advice for couples using "I" statements:

  • Start sentences with "I feel..." instead of "You did..."

  • Explain how their actions personally affected your feelings

  • Don't judge their intentions or character


A couple of other examples sound like:

  • "I feel taken for granted when I'm expected to do all the chores."

  • "I feel really loved and appreciated when you hug me after a stressful day."


Overall, speaking your truth with "I" statements allows kinder, more productive conflict resolution between partners. It builds understanding by sharing feelings calmly. This couples therapy technique is an important piece of relationship advice for improving intimacy through words of affirmation, and can help you both overcome issues with care before they escalate into big fights.


Compliment More and Criticize Less


To help your partner feel confident and bring you closer, make an effort to give way more genuine compliments than criticisms. Focus on all the wonderful qualities you truly admire about them - their humor, talents, style, kindness, brains, dedication, and more.


Compliment specific things like their smile, adventurous spirit, skills as a musician or artist. Use details to make compliments meaningful, not just generic praise. Tell them how you love their quirky personality or their ability to cheer you up when you're sad.


Don't just compliment big impressive stuff either. Also appreciate the little thoughtful things they do every day. Thank them for bringing you coffee in the morning, taking out the trash, sending you funny memes during the day, or giving you hugs when you’re stressed.


When you express gratitude for both big and small acts of kindness, your partner will feel seen, valued and motivated to keep nurturing your relationship. They’ll glow knowing their efforts don’t go unnoticed. Avoiding unnecessary criticism also prevents slowly hurting their confidence.


Being extra generous with sincere praise keeps your love feeling positive and appreciated. It reminds you both how lucky you are to have such an amazing partner! Don’t take that for granted.


Here are some examples of genuine compliments to improving intimacy through words of affirmation :

  • “You’re so thoughtful for always making my coffee in the mornings before work.”

  • “I’m so lucky to have a partner who believes in my dreams.”

  • “You have an amazing sense of humor and always know how to make me smile.”

  • “I love how you take time to ask me about my day and listen.”

  • “You’re so talented at guitar, I love watching you play.”

  • “Thank you for picking up groceries on your way home, that was really helpful.”

  • “Your determination inspires me to work harder too.”

  • “You look so beautiful when you dress up for date night.”


Overall, being generous with sincere compliments and praise keeps your love feeling positive, appreciated and fresh. The positive reinforcement boosts your partner's confidence too. Criticize only when absolutely necessary. The more genuine praise you give, the closer and more confident you’ll both feel in the relationship! Don’t take an amazing partner for granted.


Compromise Intelligently on Disagreements


All couples will sometimes face conflicts when opinions or wishes differ. Learning to compromise well on disagreements prevents resentment and is an expert piece of relationship advice for maintaining a healthy relationship.


When you disagree, first identify your shared goals. If arguing over vacation plans, focus on the mutual desire to have fun and reconnect.


Next, discuss openly and respect each other's perspectives. Don't dismiss their wants just because they're different from yours. Show you understand where they're coming from.


Then look for compromises where you both give a little. Maybe do one adventurous activity your partner wants, and one relaxing activity you prefer.


Compromising takes empathy, patience and seeing their viewpoint. Communicate respectfully to find solutions satisfying you both.


Approaching conflicts as partners, not enemies, keeps little disagreements from becoming huge fights that threaten the relationship and the relationship's intimacy.


Here are some actionable compromise tips:

  • Identify mutual goals and desired outcome

  • Discuss perspectives openly and respectfully

  • Validate each other's feelings and wants

  • Look for acceptable compromises you both can live with

  • Show empathy and patience

  • Communicate calmly to find win-win solutions

For example, if you disagree on vacation plans:

  • Recognize you both want to relax, have fun, and reconnect

  • Explain what activities you each want to do and why

  • Don't dismiss their ideas just because they're different

  • Look for ways to include some of both of your wishes

  • Maybe do a relaxing spa day they want plus an adventurous hike you want

  • Compromise so you're both satisfied


Compromising well allows you to resolve disagreements smoothly without anyone feeling resentful. It prevents little fights from becoming huge relationship-damaging blowups.


Approach conflicts as partners working together, not as adversaries. With empathy, communication and effort, you can compromise intelligently in ways that make you closer.


Compromise is a relationship superpower! It requires patience, understanding, and willingness to give a little for the sake of your love. But it's worth it.


Laugh Together Every Day


Laughter is great medicine for relationships! Embracing daily playfulness and humor lifts moods, reduces stress, and emotionally brings you closer.


Look for fun ways to share more laughs. Tell funny stories from your day over dinner. Send hilarious memes referencing inside jokes. Have regular game nights with charades, Pictionary or other silly games.


Plan fun surprises too, like recreating awkward memories or getting each other’s favorite treats. Dance, sing, and be silly together. Playfulness and humor keep your relationship feeling happy and youthful.


Even when arguing, try injecting gentle humor to chill out tension. Laughter helps you reunite.


Here are some tips for sharing more daily laughter:

  • Tell amusing stories from your day at work or school over dinner

  • Send each other funny memes, jokes, or videos during the day

  • Have regular game nights with charades, Pictionary, Cards Against Humanity

  • Make up outrageous “would you rather” scenarios or hypothetical funny situations

  • Be ridiculous together! Have dance parties, sing in silly accents, tell jokes

  • Plan thoughtful surprises like recreating your first date or getting favorite desserts

  • Add humor and playfulness into everyday moments - chores, errands, getting ready

Laughter strengthens emotional connection. It’s hard to stay angry when you’re laughing together. Injecting humor during disagreements helps diffuse tension.


Playfulness relieves stress, making your relationship a fun retreat from life’s pressures. Keeping your sense of humor alive together even during tough times is so important.


When you make small doses of laughter a daily habit, you lift each other's spirits consistently. You take life a little less seriously.


Shared laughter and being silly bonds you on a deep level. It allows you to be your goofy, flawed, authentic selves together. Your home becomes a lighthearted sanctuary where passion and joy thrive.


Don’t underestimate the magic power of embracing humor and playfulness. Make it a priority to laugh together every day - it keeps your relationship spark alive!


Cultivate Meaningful Physical and Emotional Intimacy


While physical intimacy matters, true intimacy means letting yourself be fully open and real with your partner. It goes much deeper than just physical touch.


Share your deepest hopes, dreams, insecurities, fears and painful memories. Discuss how you feel truly understood and appreciated. Open up about differences and similarities between you.


Admit mistakes and times you feel lonely or insecure. Don’t pretend to be perfect - reveal your messy, imperfect self. Letting your partner fully know every part of you creates profound intimacy.


Give affection daily - hold hands, cuddle, kiss, massage. Leave sweet notes. Make their favorite meal or playlist. Little acts of love and romance keep your connection deepening.


Choosing emotional intimacy builds powerful trust and understanding that lasts beyond initial excitement fading.


Here are tips for deeper intimacy:

  • Share your secret dreams and biggest fears

  • Admit regrets, insecurities, shame, childhood hurts

  • Discuss topics and feelings you don’t usually reveal

  • Be open about body image worries or aging concerns

  • Confide emotional pain and ask for comfort

  • Don’t pretend to be strong if you’re struggling

  • Explain your love languages and attachment style

  • Request affection and quality time when needing more


Emotional intimacy examples:

  • Cooking their favorite meal just because

  • Giving massages with aromatherapy oils after a long day

  • Holding hands, kissing, hugging often to stay connected

  • Writing handwritten love letters expressing your devotion

  • Making playlists with meaningful “us” songs

  • Saying “I love you” and “I appreciate you” regularly with true meaning


Physical intimacy is great. But emotional intimacy based on radical authenticity creates unbreakable trust and understanding. This intimacy lasts a lifetime.


Don’t be afraid to need your partner sometimes. Admit hurts you usually hide. Allow yourself to be imperfectly human. The more you reveal your messy inner world, the closer you’ll feel.


Take risks being vulnerable. Choose intimacy daily through communication, affection and playfulness. Your love will deepen infinitely.


Support Each Other's Personal Growth


While joining lives in a relationship is beautiful, avoid losing your individual identities. Make personal growth through new interests, hobbies, friends, adventures, self-love and self-development a priority.


You should each have things that light you up outside the relationship. Then come back together and share these experiences. Discuss interesting stuff you’re learning and new skills you’re acquiring.


Be willing to relocate if needed for your partner's career dreams. Brainstorm ways to cheer each other on toward accomplishments or brave new adventures that foster self-knowledge and growth. Hold each other accountable for following through on goals.


Nurturing diverse individual interests gives you exciting new things to bond over and prevents stagnation. It results in continuous personal growth and evolving personalities, which strengthens your connection. You’ll keep discovering wonderful new facets of your partner.


Here are some tips:

  • Have some hobbies, interests, or friend groups separate from your partner

  • Take classes to learn new skills like cooking, art, languages

  • Read books, listen to podcasts, watch documentaries to expand your worldview

  • Go on adventures like hiking, camping, road trips by yourself sometimes

  • Make progress on career goals through networking, education etc.

  • Work toward fitness goals like running a marathon or getting toned

  • Explore your spirituality through practices like meditation, prayer

  • Join community groups to meet people and give back

  • Try new daring experiences outside your comfort zone


Then share these solo growth experiences with your partner by:

  • Discussing interesting ideas and perspectives you’ve learned

  • Teaching each other new skills

  • Bonding over stories from your separate adventures

  • Being willing to relocate for their career aspirations

  • Brainstorming how to support each other's bold dreams

  • Motivating each other to keep growing and seeking challenges


Nurturing your own interests prevents stagnation and gives you exciting new things to bond over. Personal growth strengthens you as individuals and as a couple. Keep evolving!


Establish Shared Values and Vision


Having ongoing open talks about your values, life priorities, and vision for the future cements the foundation for a lifelong relationship. These convos shouldn't just happen once.


Explore each other's perspectives on deeper topics like definitions of family, parenting, spirituality, ethics, civic duties, success, legacy, and other guiding principles influencing major life decisions.


There's no need to align perfectly on everything - embrace your fascinating differences too! But do look for core beliefs and morals you share. What values anchor you? Besides love, what drives you? Discussing this meaningful stuff provides insight into who you both truly are.


Next, with your values and priorities clear, thoughtfully outline your short- and long-term relationship goals. Do you both want to volunteer more to help causes important to you? Are you on the same page about having kids or adopting pets someday? What does your dream home look like? Do you want to travel the world?


Get super clear on the major life experiences you want to create together in coming years. Defining an inspiring shared vision for the future grounds you as a team and gives direction when life feels aimless.


Revisiting these purposeful talks at major milestones ensures you keep evolving beautifully together over decades. Knowing you're both working toward the same overarching goals gives hope in hard times and strengthens commitment. Your shared values, ethics and vision are the roots that let your partnership thrive long-term.


To establish shared vision, try:

  • Having ongoing open talks about deeper life topics, not just one conversation

  • Exploring each other's perspectives on family, parenting, spirituality, ethics, civic duty, success, legacy

  • Embracing fascinating differences but also finding core common ground

  • Getting clear on values and priorities guiding major life decisions

  • Outlining short- and long-term relationship goals you're both excited about

  • Envisioning your ideal future together - kids, pets, vacations, dream home?

  • Defining an inspiring shared vision that gives your relationship meaning and direction

  • Revisiting these big talks at major milestones to keep growing together

  • Finding hope in hard times knowing you're working toward the same goals

  • Letting your common values, ethics and vision anchor your partnership


Keep asking meaningful questions. Explore each other's inner worlds. Craft your love story consciously. Shared vision fortifies relationships to last decades.


Shower Your Partner with Thoughtful Gestures


In this busy world, it's easy to take loved ones for granted. But small, consistent thoughtful acts can deepen your connection and love. Make an effort to do little things just because you know it'll make your partner smile!


Bring them coffee in bed when their alarm goes off, especially on big workdays. Leave sweet short love notes in surprising spots they'll find during their day - in their lunch bag, car, purse. Send encouraging texts when you know they're stressed.


Help out by doing chores they dislike without being asked - fold laundry, wash dishes, clean bathrooms, take out trash. Surprise them with favorite takeout or dessert after an exhausting week. Run them a bath when their body is sore. These little acts of service and romance add up.


When you pay attention to their needs and nurture their happiness in small ways, your partner feels truly cared for. They know you think about their wellbeing and are committed to the relationship.


These frequent small gestures matter infinitely more than occasional big displays of affection on holidays. Consistent thoughtfulness keeps your daily love feeling fresh and appreciated. Don't take it for granted.


Here are more thoughtful acts of services or gestures to make your partner feel loved:

  • Bring coffee in bed on busy mornings

  • Leave sweet notes in surprising spots they’ll find during their day

  • Send encouraging texts when you know they’re stressed

  • Make their morning routine easier by laying out their clothes

  • Help with chores and tasks they dislike without being asked

  • Surprise them with favorite takeout, treats, flowers after a tiring week

  • Give massages with aromatherapy oils when their body is sore

  • Cook their favorite meal just because

  • Run them a hot bath with candles to help them unwind

  • Compliment them and give random affection throughout the day

  • Take over an annoying chore like folding laundry or doing dishes

  • Write handwritten love letters expressing your devotion

  • Plan a fun surprise date doing an activity you know they’ll love

The key is to pay attention to your partner’s needs and nurture their happiness through small acts of service, romance and consideration consistently. This thoughtfulness demonstrates your care and commitment better than occasional big gestures ever could.


Make small thoughtful acts a daily priority, not just on special occasions. It deepens love by making your partner feel cared for every single day. Don’t take them for granted.


Learn Your Partner's Love Language


Everyone feels loved in different ways. Learn your partner's unique "love language" and adjust your actions accordingly. For example, if your partner craves quality time, plan regular date nights and deep talks. If they thrive on physical affection, give more hugs, kisses, massages. For gift-oriented folks, bring home little trinkets that show you're thinking of them.


And for those who need words of affirmation, express verbal appreciation and praise as often as you can. When you tailor your actions to make your partner feel cherished in ways that resonate most deeply with them, it fortifies your bond remarkably.


Check out our post on Gary Chapman's 5 love languages, if you want to learn more.


Argue Productively by Fighting Fair


All couples will argue sometimes. How you handle disagreements determines whether they pull you apart or bring you closer long-term. Here's couples relationship advice on fighting fair and improving communication:


  • If emotions are high, take a break to cool off separately. Revisit the issue once you've both had space to process feelings calmly.

  • Never insult, mock or criticize your partner's character when upset. Those hurtful jabs are hard to forget.

  • Rather than compromise only on surface details, identify solutions allowing both partners' core needs to be met.

  • Expressing anger, hurt or disappointment is normal and healthy - do so gently without attacking your partner's intentions. The goal is to resolve this specific conflict constructively, not dredge up past issues or be cruel.


With mutual care and effort, disagreements can help you gain deeper understanding of each other's needs, making your partnership stronger. Over time, you'll get better at navigating conflicts as a team.


Don't view it as you two against each other - look at it as you both against the issue. If you listen, validate, compromise intelligently, and forgive mistakes, you'll survive conflicts together.


The goal of fair fighting is resolving conflicts constructively to ultimately strengthen your relationship, not attacking or punishing your partner. Handled respectfully, disagreements can build understanding. Choose compassion.


In Summary


Being an exceptional partner is an ongoing choice to show up emotionally and invest in each other's growth and happiness daily - together and separately.


It takes constant effort and incorporating learned relationship advice to strengthen the foundation of intimacy, friendship and trust that allows relationships to endure challenges through tough times. When conflicts inevitably arise, handle them with grace, respect and calm communication.


Keep seeking to understand each other. Embrace playfulness and laughter. Compromise wisely. Express gratitude often. Support each other's dreams. Sincerely evolve together.


With relentless mutual effort and care, the love between you will only keep maturing, deepening and withstanding the test of time.


Yours is a lifelong love story to craft consciously. Stay present to each other. Communicate with empathy. Handle hard times with wisdom and teamwork. Don't lose hope during struggles or take peaceful times for granted. Instead, keep seeking expert relationship advice for maintaining a healthy relationship. And, implement actionable relationship techniques for avoiding common pitfalls.


Despite ups, downs and changes throughout the decades, your relationship can be something sacred you nourish together. Keep choosing each other. Keep growing together. Keep falling in love over and over again with each evolving version of your partner.


That's the beauty of lifelong commitment - it's not about just that spark in the beginning, but the ever-unfolding journey you share. By giving your all to nurture this priceless bond every single day, you build a once-in-a-lifetime love built to last. Here's to truly incorporating the relationship advice you learn and experiencing a relationship that will only grow richer with time!


 

Frequently Asked Relationship Questions


What qualities make an ideal partner?


The best partners are reliable, honest, supportive, communicative, passionate, empathetic, committed to improving themselves and the relationship. Choose someone who brings out your best self.


What actionable relationship advice do you have for avoiding common pitfalls?


Don't cheat, control, emotional abuse, distrust, act selfish, constantly criticize, or be codependent. Also, don't neglect nurturing intimacy, playfulness and romance.


What is good advice for new relationships?


Take it slowly opening up. Notice any red flags early. Manage expectations and give space. Focus on communication, trust and intimacy before getting too serious. Enjoy each step.


How can you show love and care daily?


Express gratitude when they do thoughtful things, listen fully, give random affection, help when stressed, give heartfelt compliments. Most importantly, make them a priority.


How do you know your partner truly loves you?


Signs include making you a priority, forgiving mistakes, supporting dreams, caring about your wellbeing, compromising on conflicts, communicating openly and honestly, showing affection often, and meeting your needs.


1 Comment


Guest
Aug 02, 2023

As always, great post! I needed this advice when I was younger..

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